curlio.com: Flavor of Love 2, Ep. 5: Big Girls Don’t Cry

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Flavor of Love 2, Ep. 5: Big Girls Don’t Cry

Nicole

2006-09-04 21:02:37

Recap from Nicole

After Toastee’s dismissal for her work in the adult entertainment industry, the girls in the Flavor of Love mansion are feeling a bit down. They have been living together for a whole week and a half (OMG!!!!) and are starting to get on each other’s nerves. The tension between former buddies Krazy and Delishis is revisited, as is the suspicions Like Dat has about Buckwild being authentic.

The girls are eating breakfast when we are treated to a montage of Like Dat chewing with her mouth open and chugging orange juice straight from the jug. Buckeey tells us that she has known many women from New York and, like Like Dat, they are all gross. Then Big Rick comes in with the Flav-o-gram. Buckwild reads and the girls learn that they will be hosting a party for some of Flav’s friends today. Immediately, they girls think that this is some kind of trick and it will be old people or little kids. They are instructed to unload the party supply truck in the front of the mansion and set up for the party.

The truck has various pool party items in it and the girls get to work setting up the backyard for a pool party. However, some of the women duck out the set up responsibilities. Deelishus is seen inside, fretting over the state of her hair while Buckeey looks on, while Like Dat and Buckwild are shown working very hard in the back yard. Needless to say, Like Dat calls out the girls who weren’t helping cuz she likes to keep it real and a small screaming match ensues.

The girls are still waiting for their guests outside when Flav meets them at the front door in hundred dollar bill pajamas. The guests are various famous and not quite famous rappers: Ying Yang Twins, DJ Quick, Bishop Don Juan, Warren G, and Three Six Mafia.
****Memorable quote: (Nibblez) Bischop Don Juan is the schnazziescht drescher I’ve ever scheen.*****
With the exception of Warren G, Flav is way more famous than any of these guys, so it’s nice to see him helping the little folks out. Flav gathers his guests and asks them to keep an eye on the girls. He’s trying to figure out whose here for the right reasons and the rappers can help him. Then he leads them into the backyard where they all make a grand entrance.

The girls squeal appropriately, even though it’s pretty clear that some of them have no idea who some of theses guests are. Flav leaves to get changed (really he spies on the party from his balcony) and good times begin. Bootz treats the guests to her rump-shaker routine, which involves bending over and jiggling her behind.
****Memorable quote: (One of the Ying Yang twins to Bootz after her rumpshaker routing): Girl, blah gobledy gook gibberish sh!t yada nada bdkownoipojg adiobngokn. A Flav-ation translation runs on the bottom of the screen telling us that he enjoyed Bootz’ dancing and would like her to be in one of their videos.****
Like Dat gets into a discussion which may or may not have been in English regarding whether or not a big girl can be sexy, then jumps in the pool with all her clothes on. Nibblez takes it upon herself to entertain the rappers’ posse, rather than the rappers themselves and does a cat-poop-squat in front of a large bodyguard type. She then flashes her breasts but has to make a quick exit because she has drunk herself silly and spends the rest of the party passed out in bed, after a quick vomit.
****Memorable quote: (Like Dat to Nibblez as she pukes) Girl, don’t play with it.****
Krazy quickly gets herself in trouble with Three Six Mafia, who ask her if she’s a fan of Flav’s music. Krazy says yes and then they quickly ask her to sing one of his songs, which she cannot do. They start ganging up on her, insinuating that she’s just after Flav for fame and she tries to defend herself, saying that she likes him as a person and while she might not know his music well enough to sing a song of his, she’s familiar with it. The other girls look on as Krazy is attacked and do nothing. Krazy later reveals that she expected on of her friends to back her up, like Deelishus. Deelishus says that Krazy is, well, crazy and why would she help her out in a competition. The party winds down as Flav enters and starts asking his rapper friends for feedback on the girls.

Back in the mansion, the rappers give Flav their feedback on the girls. Like Dat is complimented as a cool chick, but one who would be one of the homies rather than a love interest. Flav nods his head in agreement. Many people feel that Krazy is fake because she claimed to know Flav’s music but could not sing a song on command. Bootz is universally appreciated for her dancing abilities. And the big, silent bodyguard speaks up to say the Nibblez personally made his time enjoyable and it’s a shame she can’t hold her liquor. Flav thanks them and, after escorting them out, decides that he needs to spend some one on one time with some of the girls before the next elimination.

Meanwhile, Like Dat has decided to confront Buckwild about her black-cent, again. She tells Buckwild that she doesn’t believe it and that the accent seems to come and go. Buckwild once again claims that she’s genuine and it’s just a personality quirk of hers that she talks like whoever she’s talking to. If she’s talking to someone from England, she starts to get an English accent. Like Dat isn’t buying it and advises Buckwild to keep it real. This really upsets Buckwild, who starts crying and worrying that she’ll be thought of as a racist.
****Memorable quote: (teary Buckwild) How can I be a racist? I’m here to date Flavor Flav, who’s like the blackest guy in the world, except for his teeth.****
Like Dat, upon seeing that Buckwild is so upset that she has begun to pack her bags, switches into the mother hen and comforts the younger girl, going so far as to climb into bed with her and pet her head. Buckwild agrees to stay.

The next morning, Flav finds Buckeey lounging in a very, very short (how short? The bottom hem had to be blurred out) nightie and invites her up to his room for some one on one time. She eagerly follows, though Like Dat is lurking behind them, angry that she’s not getting the one on one time. Up in Flav’s room, he and Buckeey make out. It’s only moderately gross, because she’s kind of nasty too. Flav praises her backside and she tells us that she’s really happy they got to spend some time together and work on their connection.

After Flav’s morning make-out session with Buckeey, he’s off to find another girl to spend some quality time with when he encounters Bootz and Krazy in the middle of screaming match. Bootz has decided to call Krazy out as a phony, again because of the music thing from the previous day. She pretty much chases Krazy up the stairs, screaming stuff at her like “Don’t front,” “You got called out,” and “You’re a fake-ass b!tch.” Flav lets the drama run its course and the other girls gather around him to watch. When the screaming has stopped, Flav praises Bootz for the passionate way that she has defended her man and invites her to go swimming with him. Krazy is understandably upset, so Nibblez gives her a book of inspirational quotes to read. I laugh in surprise that both Nibblez and Krazy can read.

Down at the pool, Bootz has emerged for her one on one time with Flav in a bikini that is, shall we say, under a great amount of strain. Flav’s instructs her to jump in the pool and she runs in. The editors of the show reveal their great sense of humor, as they pause the film so we can hear Bootz’ deep thoughts.
****Memorable quote: (Bootz as she’s about to jump in the pool) What the heck am I doing? I’m going to mess up my weave.****
Bootz is then shown in slow motion jumping into the pool in order to highlight the two enormous flotation devices attached to her chest. Flav, needless to say, appreciates these assets. They swim and cuddle in the pool and then the date is over. Back in the mansion, Bootz reveals that she did indeed mess up her weave, but it was all worth it and she still looks cute.

Flav has retreated to his room to play with his keyboard and muse on tonight’s elimination when he hears a series of booming footsteps and a loud knock on the door. It’s Like Dat, who has come to confirm her commitment to Flav wearing a dirty kitchen apron. She takes about ten minutes to tell him she has something special to show him. She leaves and Flav waits, contemplating what his homies said about her yesterday: she’s a great friend but not really a love interest. Like Dat returns with some garments that she spreads out on Flav’s bed. Flav tells us that they are big girl lingerie and laughs at them. Like Dat proceeds to do her super-fast, makes-little-sense speech about the virtues of her lingerie and holds each garment up for Flav to see. Flav rushes her out of the room and then collapses on the floor laughing.
****Memorable quote: (Flav after Like Dat’s lingerie show) That’s a big girl. One of her thighs is like two of my bodies.****

Finally, it’s time for the elimination. Clocks are given out until only two remain: Beautuful (who has gotten NO screen time) and Like Dat. Beautuful tells us that if she goes instead of one of these nasty ho’s, she’ll be very upset. Flav calls Like Dat down, but instead of giving her a clock, he tells her that he really likes her and he’s not going to front with her and pretend to like her Like Dat. Like Dat answers with another long, rambling speech that seems to mean that everything’s okay and ‘that’s better than nothing (?)’. Beautuful gets the last clock and Like Dat (real name Darra) says outside the mansion that it’s not fair that the big girl can always be a guy’s friend but is never thought of as sexy.

Flav gathers the girls to drink to Like that and then arranges them in a line facing the door. He announces that he’s invited a special guest to stay with the girls and help him until the next elimination. The girls anxiously wait, and then NEW YORK! bursts through the door. For those who don’t remember (but really, how could you forget New York), she was the runner up in Flavor of Love 1 and infamous for being a condescending b!tch to the other women and psychotically devoted to Flav. She yells out “Hi B!tches” and greets Flav with a long French kiss.
****Memorable quote: (Deelishus upon seeing New York) Oh, heck no!****
The girls roll their eyes and shake with fear.

Tune in next week, when we get to watch New York yank girls out of their seats by the hair, boss everyone around on a photo shoot and make at least two girls cry. Hooray!

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guest ( Guest )

2006-09-29 17:43:56


	dont do New York now i hope she win but why would they want him he ugly but i guess they like his money aint but its iight and i think most of them Myspace profiles fake